Ideas In Motion

The question of whether we are special, average, or unique is one that resonates deeply with many of us. It forces us to confront our self-perception and our place in the world. Are we destined for greatness, or are we part of the silent majority who eventually settle? If we settle, is that inherently bad?

The Line Between Striving and Settling

At some point, we all grapple with the notion of striving versus accepting. Where does ambition end and contentment begin? The difficulty lies in the absence of clear guidelines. No one hands us a roadmap to distinguish between persevering toward a dream and knowing when to embrace the life we’ve already built.

The Persistent Question: Am I Special?

This question often leads to introspection and doubt. If I am special, why don’t I confidently chart my own path? If I’m average, should I emulate the strategies of those who have succeeded? Yet, deep down, we push forward, caught between questioning our uniqueness and striving to validate it.

A memory comes to mind: a professor for a Master’s degree once posed the haunting question, “You all are the best in your field, top in your company, and learning from the best university in the country; hence, why don’t you apply the lessons you’ve learned to your own life?” This speaks to a universal truth—often, we excel at providing advice to others or in professional settings but falter when it comes to our personal lives.

Why Do We Stay Stuck?

Another big question, and the beauty of the answer, is the elegant, simple way to replay it. When you don’t move, you are stopped; when you are taking the same decision, you are in the same place, all over again; when you don’t analyze your failure, you will commit those again. It comes to the part to avoid taking action, to the fear of falling again, but when you decide to move and decide that is enough, you can see how your progress is.

Here’s where actionable insights come into play:

• Awareness of Your Environment: Understand the factors influencing your life. Where are you? Who surrounds you? What resources do you have?
• Goal-Setting and Review: Set clear goals, document them, and periodically review your progress. Studies show that writing down goals increases the likelihood of success by 42% (Matthews, 2015).
• After-Action Reviews (AARs): Reflect on failures not as setbacks but as learning opportunities. Ask: What worked? What didn’t? What can I do differently next time?

Without these practices, we risk stagnation, relying on external circumstances to dictate our outcomes.

Fear: The Underlying Barrier

Fear often lies at the heart of inaction—fear of change, fear of failure, or even fear of success. It’s paradoxical but real. Change is uncomfortable, and many of us remain in the familiar, even when it no longer serves us.

To overcome this, one must adopt a mindset of deliberate action. Evidence-based strategies can help:

• Start Small: Research in habit formation by James Clear (author of Atomic Habits) suggests that tiny, consistent changes lead to lasting transformation.
• Cognitive Reframing: Studies in psychology recommend reframing fear as excitement. This shifts focus from apprehension to opportunity.
• Decision Paralysis: Acknowledge that indecision is itself a choice. Behavioral economist Dan Ariely emphasizes the cost of inaction in terms of lost opportunities and personal growth.

Choosing Change

Ultimately, the most profound realization is this: What you are not changing, you are choosing. This statement underscores the power of choice in shaping our lives. Inaction, though comfortable, is a passive acceptance of the status quo.

To break free, we must act—not just dream, not just plan, but act. Establish clear objectives, maintain focus, and have the courage to follow through.

Because in the end, the answer to whether you are special, average, or unique isn’t as important as this: Are you becoming the best version of yourself?

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Because in the end, the answer to whether you are special, average, or unique isn’t as important as this: Are you becoming the best version of yourself? Are you doing the best on what you already have?